recovery

it is scary and sad and intellectually we realize that's not reasonable, the recovery from surgery proceeds normally, and yet we still tremble to even say the name of the surgery because it is brutal and the indication for the surgery is brutal too and we can't speak that either



fear and love and sadness paralyses and de-differentiates things of the world and you learn, through your years of confronting other people's pain and ugliness and injury, to keep level headed to some extent and at least to keep working right along



writing legible instructions and explaining things in simple language in well modulated tones and remaining skeptical of the instant acquiescence produced by the promise of resolution your presence holds out - the acquiescence you don't demand or expect but it is there always - and one time you may find you are the frightened brokenhearted disoriented loved one as well as the levelheaded and methodical strategist of recovery



recovery

we have to trust in somebody after all
somebody or other
we have to trust in the happy ending



because all this love all this love all this love where will it go otherwise what will become of it